


Wistful Spaces

by BethAdastra



Series: 2157: Prompts & Oneshots [1]
Category: Mass Effect Trilogy
Genre: Angst, Burning Worlds, F/M, Sadness and Shepard's Lack of Communication Skills, Tragedy, y'know the usual
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-18
Updated: 2018-02-18
Packaged: 2019-03-20 16:15:07
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 852
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13721358
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BethAdastra/pseuds/BethAdastra
Summary: A fill for "after being apart" (here there be no porn, only angst).Shepard is reunited with Garrus after Menae, and things do not go as easily as she had hoped.





	Wistful Spaces

She swore she would wait, she really did.

But seeing him crouched in the battery, the rich red overhead lights giving more shadows than light, sent her heart aflutter. The sound of his voice, echoing from behind an electrical panel, made it pound in her ears. And when he stood, cutting a comm link to the Primarch and towering a good foot above her, she felt her heart leap into her throat.

_I missed you, Garrus._

The words spun around in her head to the point that she felt dizzy. I missed you, I missed you, I missed you, _I missed you._

She thought it day in and day out during her internment. When Luna went dark, and she was sliding down rooftops between the bay and the abominations that guarded it, she gasped the words between every clip of ammo. When she was busy collecting bruises and martian sand inside her armor, she said the words, over and over, as if they actually had the power to bring them back together. When she landed on Menae, and she saw her wish come true at the cost of thousands of turian lives, she felt it to the point that every set of blue armor made her sick.

“I missed you, Garrus.”

She said the words like an incantation. But it was his eyes, framed by the well-healed scars and a set of fresh, new cuts that finally brought her mouth to his mandible. His eyes, so full of questions, told her that he had just as much to lose, had already lost, that he had missed her just as much as she missed him. A younger, more selfish Shepard would have delighted in such a situation. The reality of their situation kept the reunion more bitter than sweet, and Shepard was tired of carrying that terrible ache in her chest.

She stood on her tip toes, and sent a silent thank you to Garrus when he leaned down to remove the distance. His talons circled around her shoulders, so careful and so light that it seemed painful. He was being cautious, protecting not only her skin, but both of their sensibilities and warrior egos.

His mouth opened, and he murmured something about reunion protocols. And then he started blabbering, and it sent a small thrill through her when she realized that he was using nervous undertones, and that she could actually recognize it. She would repeat it over and over, but _oh_ how she had missed these little moments, these things and words and feelings that made him the person she cared so much about. He was scared, and brash, and lost, and flawed, and he was all she wanted.

“Garrus.”

He stopped, his mandibles flapping at the interruption. She gave him a smirk, and stroked the unwounded side of his face before giving him a chaste kiss.

Leave it to Garrus to research himself into a nervous breakdown on interspecies relationships. At least she had good methods to keep him from digging himself into that hole. When her lips parted from his, she looked up.

“ _That’s_ the protocol on reunions.”

The resulting hum was void of anxiety, and instead sent a rush of warmth to her cheeks. Both of her hands came to his face, and for a short moment, she let their foreheads press together.

“I missed you Garrus… I, well, I thought about you every day.”

“I missed you too, Shepard.”

She couldn’t fully understand it, but she knew she was hearing the sound of a broken person being put back together in the tonal buzzes of the turian’s voice. She wished that it could be that easy for her too, that Garrus’ words could save her as easily as she fantasized they could, but there were still too many blows left to take, too many fractures to add to the tally.

Why did it have to be that way? They had both seen their worlds burning. They both had scars to show, and they knew this would be inevitable. They had done everything right, and they were still losing. She didn’t even realize that tears were falling down until Garrus’ talons brushed over her cheeks and lips. When her breath came out as a sob, she huffed out an awkward laugh, and blinked up at him.

“Six months was far too long. I’m here to make up for lost time.”

She hooked her fingers over the front of Garrus’ cowl, and pulled him in for a fierce kiss and closed her eyes.

-

It wasn’t until they were both on the floor, panting and shivering from sweat gone cold that it fully hit Shepard that here, at the end of the universe, even with him by her side, she would always be missing him. He would never see this small, lonely part of her, and she would never let him. It was the only thing she had to protect him, it was the only thing that _had_ protected him. Missing Garrus meant loving him, and if it kept him alive, she would miss him until the day she died.


End file.
